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Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 07:31:32 AM
Once I have a clean character sheet your character may move about the city freely...
Description: http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/Waterdeep_(city)

Map: http://www.candlekeep.com/downloads/ez_waterdeep.zip
Map is awesome and will be handy while in the City of Waterdeep.

Where are you? What are you doing?

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 08:09:25 AM
I'm gonna hit the HOUSE OF WONDERS and ask the fine people of that establishment to shove some magic loving into my crossbow

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 08:15:34 AM
for money

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 08:16:39 AM
if someone's doing something heretical let me know because i wanna persecute them

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 08:53:20 AM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680450']I'm gonna hit the HOUSE OF WONDERS and ask the fine people of that establishment to shove some magic loving into my crossbow

What spell do you want to store?

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 09:05:04 AM
if someone's doing something heretical let me know because i wanna persecute them

What's heretical? I don't know enough about your character to properly rp this. I don't think I have the updates character sheet with f1/C4 yet.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 09:06:14 AM
Touch of Idiocy :smug:

~ JIMMY PATTERSON

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 09:12:15 AM
if someone's doing something heretical let me know because i wanna persecute them

What's heretical? I don't know enough about your character to properly rp this. I don't think I have the updates character sheet with f1/C4 yet.

um it's the first reply in your "post character here" thread.

heretical for st. cuth probably means basically unlawfulness. the religion seems to want happy worker drones living out their peaceful undisturbed lives, so troublemakers are basically heretics, subversives, rebels, hucksters misleading people into scams and traps. that's what i get form this anyway: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Cuthbert_%28Dungeons_%26_Dragons%29#Scriptur es

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 09:25:42 AM
if someone's doing something heretical let me know because i wanna persecute them

What's heretical? I don't know enough about your character to properly rp this. I don't think I have the updates character sheet with f1/C4 yet.

um it's the first reply in your "post character here" thread.

heretical for st. cuth probably means basically unlawfulness. the religion seems to want happy worker drones living out their peaceful undisturbed lives, so troublemakers are basically heretics, subversives, rebels, hucksters misleading people into scams and traps. that's what i get form this anyway: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Cuthbert_%28Dungeons_%26_Dragons%29#Scriptur es

I got your sheet.

Okay then, make your way to the trade district and you can preach and harangue people being wicked and unlawful until you 1. lose your voice 2. get attacked by a mob of irritated hucksters.

Bartholomew Roberts
6 Jul 11, 09:32:56 AM
Having grown up on the island of Mypos, I have come to the land of opportunity, Waterdeep, in search of my waterdeepian relative, Larry Appleton.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 09:39:19 AM
What's heretical? I don't know enough about your character to properly rp this. I don't think I have the updates character sheet with f1/C4 yet.

um it's the first reply in your "post character here" thread.

heretical for st. cuth probably means basically unlawfulness. the religion seems to want happy worker drones living out their peaceful undisturbed lives, so troublemakers are basically heretics, subversives, rebels, hucksters misleading people into scams and traps. that's what i get form this anyway: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Cuthbert_%28Dungeons_%26_Dragons%29#Scriptur es

I got your sheet.

Okay then, make your way to the trade district and you can preach and harangue people being wicked and unlawful until you 1. lose your voice 2. get attacked by a mob of irritated hucksters.

some specific and egregious example as a cue would be helpful. inquisitors are not preachers, they are doers. finding the worst seed of corruption and crushing it before it takes root, etc.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 09:40:32 AM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680461']Touch of Idiocy :smug:

~ JIMMY PATTERSON

You make your way to the sea ward of the city and to the House of Wonders, temple of the goddess of magic, Mystra. One of the worshipers provides the service at a cost to you of a mere 200 pieces of gold. Thank you, come again.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 09:43:33 AM
um it's the first reply in your "post character here" thread.

heretical for st. cuth probably means basically unlawfulness. the religion seems to want happy worker drones living out their peaceful undisturbed lives, so troublemakers are basically heretics, subversives, rebels, hucksters misleading people into scams and traps. that's what i get form this anyway: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Cuthbert_%28Dungeons_%26_Dragons%29#Scriptur es

I got your sheet.

Okay then, make your way to the trade district and you can preach and harangue people being wicked and unlawful until you 1. lose your voice 2. get attacked by a mob of irritated hucksters.

some specific and egregious example as a cue would be helpful. inquisitors are not preachers, they are doers. finding the worst seed of corruption and crushing it before it takes root, etc.

You make your way to the trade district on a hunt for evil doers and come upon the table of a pitchman playing a shell game with an apparently very unlucky collection of onlookers.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 09:56:35 AM
"Thank you, good worshipper!" I say in a particularly manly voice. I try to pay respect to Mystra with a melodramatic salute and then give the worshipper the 200 gp in question.

Now that I am properly equipped, it is time for me to go out and do what it is I came to this city to accomplish: Find damsels in distress in dark alleyways! I have my hand on my flail, ready to whip it out at the first sign of trouble. The first place I check is the nearest bar.

eta: Assuming I didn't piss off the worshipper with some blatant failure to show respect

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 10:09:10 AM
Having grown up on the island of Mypos, I have come to the land of opportunity, Waterdeep, in search of my waterdeepian relative, Larry Appleton.

You look around for Larry in Waterdeep.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 10:46:05 AM
Any signs of damsels?

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 11:21:29 AM
You make your way to the trade district on a hunt for evil doers and come upon the table of a pitchman playing a shell game with an apparently very unlucky collection of onlookers.

A million little corruptions can be found anywhere men gather, Gunter thinks to himself, and the Order summons me to a city where the greatest threat assailing the people is a simple con artist, running a fixed gambling game.

Gunter leans on his axe and watches. The axe was a reward of promotion, a beacon of light against the shadows. Its steady glow usually proves unnerving to any who would rather their acts be shrouded in darkness, but right now, Gunter's stare, arrow-straight from the open visor of his helmet, should be working a similar magic on the con man. This is a job for the constabulary, he thinks, if I looked at every market stall, I'd likely find as much dishonesty on both sides of the counter. All lawlessness was an affront to St. Cuthbert, but an inquisitor's role was to preempt the worst and most destabilizing abuses. The petty scams of a market that has operated for hundreds of years are clearly doing little damage to the social order.

Still, this scene could get out of hand. Reflexively, he sketches in his mind all the interesting feature of the con man's face, and runs through the questions by rote: Does this undermine the peace? Theoretically, if enough of the gamblers realize they're being cheated. Does it threaten the safety of a community? Probably not, except for any brawl that might result. Does it threaten the prosperity sufficient to succor contentment? Possibly, depending on the means of those assembled. He watches on, trying to get a feel for the crowd, the tensions that may or may not be rising. With the Saint's grace, the imposing figure of a man in jet black plate mail with a glowing axe taller than most men will be enough to scare this huckster straight. If not, but things do not get out of hand, he can describe the man accurately enough to whatever force maintains the peace. If this petty crime provokes mob anger, the situation would get more interesting.

Gunter is going to observe the situation for now; petty con artists like this are usually beneath the notice of an inquisitor, since the threat they post to public order is so low. He will intervene if things get violent, and will report the incident to the town guard and check in at the local chapterhouse for the Order of Stars Militant otherwise.

In a bit I'll post the spells he has prepared.

ETA: These are my typical spells going forward:
Lvl. 0 (5+0): Guidance (+1 to one roll), Mending (Minor repairs), Resistance (+1 saving throws), Detect Magic, Detect Poison.
Lvl. 1 (3+1): Bane (enemies -1 attack rolls, save vs. fear), Command (subject obeys command, 1 round), Summon Monster 1, Law: Protection from Chaos (+2 AC and saves, counter MC, hedges things?)
Lvl. 2 (2+1): Zone of Truth (no lies within range), Hold Person (Paralyzed 4 rounds), Law: Calm Emotions (calms, negates emotion effects)

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 12:01:53 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680478']Any signs of damsels?

You're thirsty so you make your way across town towards the trade ward, thinking it the most likely place to stop in for a drink at a tavern.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 12:04:29 PM
You make your way to the trade district on a hunt for evil doers and come upon the table of a pitchman playing a shell game with an apparently very unlucky collection of onlookers.

A million little corruptions can be found anywhere men gather, Gunter thinks to himself, and the Order summons me to a city where the greatest threat assailing the people is a simple con artist, running a fixed gambling game.

Gunter leans on his axe and watches. The axe was a reward of promotion, a beacon of light against the shadows. Its steady glow usually proves unnerving to any who would rather their acts be shrouded in darkness, but right now, Gunter's stare, arrow-straight from the open visor of his helmet, should be working a similar magic on the con man. This is a job for the constabulary, he thinks, if I looked at every market stall, I'd likely find as much dishonesty on both sides of the counter. All lawlessness was an affront to St. Cuthbert, but an inquisitor's role was to preempt the worst and most destabilizing abuses. The petty scams of a market that has operated for hundreds of years are clearly doing little damage to the social order.

Still, this scene could get out of hand. Reflexively, he sketches in his mind all the interesting feature of the con man's face, and runs through the questions by rote: Does this undermine the peace? Theoretically, if enough of the gamblers realize they're being cheated. Does it threaten the safety of a community? Probably not, except for any brawl that might result. Does it threaten the prosperity sufficient to succor contentment? Possibly, depending on the means of those assembled. He watches on, trying to get a feel for the crowd, the tensions that may or may not be rising. With the Saint's grace, the imposing figure of a man in jet black plate mail with a glowing axe taller than most men will be enough to scare this huckster straight. If not, but things do not get out of hand, he can describe the man accurately enough to whatever force maintains the peace. If this petty crime provokes mob anger, the situation would get more interesting.

Gunter is going to observe the situation for now; petty con artists like this are usually beneath the notice of an inquisitor, since the threat they post to public order is so low. He will intervene if things get violent, and will report the incident to the town guard and check in at the local chapterhouse for the Order of Stars Militant otherwise.

In a bit I'll post the spells he has prepared.

ETA: These are my typical spells going forward:
Lvl. 0 (5+0): Guidance (+1 to one roll), Mending (Minor repairs), Resistance (+1 saving throws), Detect Magic, Detect Poison.
Lvl. 1 (3+1): Bane (enemies -1 attack rolls, save vs. fear), Command (subject obeys command, 1 round), Summon Monster 1, Law: Protection from Chaos (+2 AC and saves, counter MC, hedges things?)
Lvl. 2 (2+1): Zone of Truth (no lies within range), Hold Person (Paralyzed 4 rounds), Law: Calm Emotions (calms, negates emotion effects)

The crowd around the pitchman's table begins to dwindle as does the pitchman's enthusiasm for his pitch. Noticing your gaze more and more, the man begins to put away his game and fold up his small wooden table.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 12:13:28 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680478']Any signs of damsels?

You're thirsty so you make your way across town towards the trade ward, thinking it the most likely place to stop in for a drink at a tavern.

With a mouth as dry as a sandy desert, Jimmy Patterson rides across town on the back of his faithful steed, Applejack. She neighs and rears momentarily just for kicks. A young child watches on and sees the sunlight glimmer in her sparkling white horse-teeth. The kid will never be the same after seeing a sight like that.

With a voice cracking from dryness and excessive steroid use, Jimmy cries "Forward, Applejack! Engage! Yeah!" and the two trot along towards the trade ward.

Upon arrival, Jimmy ties Applejack's reigns or whatever it is horses have to a horse tying post thing and gives her some feed from his bare hands. He whispers in goblin, the language of horses from Equestria, "Enjoy this delicious meal, dearest Applejack. I will return shortly." If horses could show jealousy, then every other horse within visual range would be turning green right now because that is just how great a horse owner Jimmy Patterson is.

Jimmy walks to the entrance of the trade ward and, with all his might, pushes the door open in a dramatic fashion.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zgv4cGXQ24E

What does he see?

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 12:14:42 PM
Rarity the mule is somewhere too but I don't really know where mules go.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 12:34:41 PM
The crowd around the pitchman's table begins to dwindle as does the pitchman's enthusiasm for his pitch. Noticing your gaze more and more, the man begins to put away his game and fold up his small wooden table.

The peace is secure, but Gunter is less than satisfied by the result. Not merely the cheating, but the apathetic reaction to it, as if the people don't realize they're being misled, do not have the common sense to notice, or have become so accustomed to lies and frauds that they can't muster up a response.

I could chase a million rats and never find the nest, he thinks. There must be a reason for the Order of Stars to summon an inquisitor to the city, but so far all Gunter can see if petty crime and an apathetic or jaded people. On the way to the chapterhouse, he dutifully informs the next city watchman he passes of all he has observed of the con man, and takes careful note of the man's reaction. Maybe it's paranoia, and he's looking so eagerly for corruption that he invents it in his mind, but it's not an inquisitor's mission to assume the rot of heresy and disorder doesn't exist.

I'm assuming he would not go to a city unless his Order had a reason, and is going to look for that reason in the events and people he observes. Generally speaking, everyday petty crime isn't enough to raise suspicion, but a pattern of widespread laxity and discontent could be the result of something more exciting! Like a cult to chaotic powers or an incipient rebellion or a wave of crime beyond the law's ability to contain or a corrupt government.

eta also fuzzy's mentioning his horse, I'm just going to assume my horse and donkey and cart are stabled somewhere I guess.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 12:36:11 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680483']Rarity the mule is somewhere too but I don't really know where mules go.

You've ridden to the trades ward along the Walls Way to Gaustus Street, then south to the Court of the White Bull, an area of the Trades Ward filled with the camps of caravaneers bringing wares to the city. To your immediate left is a Tavern called White Bull Revived. You hitch your beasts of burden and go inside the tavern, dramatically. This is a large tavern with a long bar and many tables. There only a few patron in the place right now. To your immediate view there is a collection of just off duty city watch guards (2 male and a 1 female), a simple looking old drunk (human, elderly) sitting at the bar, and a haggard looking tavern wench (about 50 years of age, not fat, not especially pretty but not too ugly) serving drinks, snacks and what appears to be some kind of stew. There is no fire in the hearth as it is hot outside, making it somewhat muggy in the tavern.

Also, a minstrel is sleeping in a chair on a small platform near the center of the place, his lute dangling from his hand and apparently about to hit the floor.

All eyes, with the exception of the sleeping minstrel's, turn towards you when you enter.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 12:54:16 PM
Also, a minstrel is sleeping in a chair on a small platform near the center of the place, his lute dangling from his hand and apparently about to hit the floor.

Jimmy Patterson knows an emergency when he sees one. Seeing the lute about to slip from the minstrels hands and land onto the floor, he immediately bolts towards the minstrel to try and prevent its inevitable destruction at the hands of the Dark Lord Gravity.

"This is it," thinks Jimmy, "This is my chance to save the day!"

Everything seems to go into slow motion. The lute slides, and finally begins to fall under the power of gravity. The many staring eyes must surely see it too and be filled with terror at what is about to happen to the poor, innocent lute.

How many years ago had the lute been forged? How many songs has it played? How many hours, nay, days of play would it add up to if you put it all together consecutively? With all of the history and sentimental attachment associated with that lute, it was surely on equal footing with a person. A queen, much loved by all her subjects who looked upon her.

Realizing that he wouldn't get there in time to grab it, Jimmy decided that desperate times called for desperate measures. He leaped forward and spun around in mid air, landing on his back and sliding across the floor in an attempt to pad the floor where it would land using his own body.

Throughout this, he yells "FOR GLOOOOOORYYYY"

Where does the lute land? How does everyone else react?

Bartholomew Roberts
6 Jul 11, 12:56:55 PM
Do I have to write out incredibly boring wot about dumb crap

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 12:57:24 PM
I'm assuming he would not go to a city unless his Order had a reason, and is going to look for that reason in the events and people he observes. Generally speaking, everyday petty crime isn't enough to raise suspicion, but a pattern of widespread laxity and discontent could be the result of something more exciting! Like a cult to chaotic powers or an incipient rebellion or a wave of crime beyond the law's ability to contain or a corrupt government.


You move along north towards the Castle Ward and the The Halls of Justice where your confessor has established a small chapel for your order. You are anxious to meet with him after your conversation with a random city guardsman. At first the city guard laughed at your report, but quickly changed his tune when he noticed your serious humorlessness about the matter. This of course confirmed your suspicions that Waterdeep was a stinking pool of corruption in desperate need of the light of St. Culthburt.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 01:29:05 PM
Do I have to write out incredibly boring wot about dumb crap

yes.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 01:30:18 PM
What do you mean "boring"? The suspense of whether or not I saved the lute is killing me.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 01:33:01 PM
You move along north towards the Castle Ward and the The Halls of Justice where your confessor has established a small chapel for your order. You are anxious to meet with him after your conversation with a random city guardsman. At first the city guard laughed at your report, but quickly changed his tune when he noticed your serious humorlessness about the matter. This of course confirmed your suspicions that Waterdeep was a stinking pool of corruption in desperate need of the light of St. Culthburt.

Perhaps it was not the most serious of crimes, but the watch should never laugh off its duty. There may or may not be any specific plot afoot, but the general attitude of laxity in the face of lawlessness is troubling. Heresy grows from idleness, and rotten doors cannot bar the thief. Gunter enters the chapel and kneels to pray by the icon of the saint until the confessor arrives.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 02:02:00 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680486']
Also, a minstrel is sleeping in a chair on a small platform near the center of the place, his lute dangling from his hand and apparently about to hit the floor.

Jimmy Patterson knows an emergency when he sees one. Seeing the lute about to slip from the minstrels hands and land onto the floor, he immediately bolts towards the minstrel to try and prevent its inevitable destruction at the hands of the Dark Lord Gravity.

"This is it," thinks Jimmy, "This is my chance to save the day!"

Everything seems to go into slow motion. The lute slides, and finally begins to fall under the power of gravity. The many staring eyes must surely see it too and be filled with terror at what is about to happen to the poor, innocent lute.

How many years ago had the lute been forged? How many songs has it played? How many hours, nay, days of play would it add up to if you put it all together consecutively? With all of the history and sentimental attachment associated with that lute, it was surely on equal footing with a person. A queen, much loved by all her subjects who looked upon her.

Realizing that he wouldn't get there in time to grab it, Jimmy decided that desperate times called for desperate measures. He leaped forward and spun around in mid air, landing on his back and sliding across the floor in an attempt to pad the floor where it would land using his own body.

Throughout this, he yells "FOR GLOOOOOORYYYY"

Where does the lute land? How does everyone else react?

The wench drops and breaks a glass of wine. The guards all stand up and draw their swords and the minstrel startles awake and falls backwards in his chair with a thud. In the nick of time you grab the lute as it drops onto your body.

After a moment of silence there is uproariously laughter from all but the old drunk who didn't really notice anything.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 02:09:55 PM
You move along north towards the Castle Ward and the The Halls of Justice where your confessor has established a small chapel for your order. You are anxious to meet with him after your conversation with a random city guardsman. At first the city guard laughed at your report, but quickly changed his tune when he noticed your serious humorlessness about the matter. This of course confirmed your suspicions that Waterdeep was a stinking pool of corruption in desperate need of the light of St. Culthburt.



Perhaps it was not the most serious of crimes, but the watch should never laugh off its duty. There may or may not be any specific plot afoot, but the general attitude of laxity in the face of lawlessness is troubling. Heresy grows from idleness, and rotten doors cannot bar the thief. Gunter enters the chapel and kneels to pray by the icon of the saint until the confessor arrives.(Next part sent to PM in order to not give away plot information to party members not privy at this time.)

Bartholomew Roberts
6 Jul 11, 03:05:32 PM
Do I have to write out incredibly boring wot about dumb crap

yes.

His tongue dry from the hot weather, Balki seeks the comfort of Ye Olde Inne for the comfort of air conditioning and a cool ale to soothe his parched throat. And mayhap a lead on his cousin, Cousin Larry.

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 03:20:03 PM
Do I have to write out incredibly boring wot about dumb crap

yes.

His tongue dry from the hot weather, Balki seeks the comfort of Ye Olde Inne for the comfort of air conditioning and a cool ale to soothe his parched throat. And mayhap a lead on his cousin, Cousin Larry.

You find yourself in the Trade District in the Court of the White Bull, there is a tavern nearby called The White Bull Revived. Perhaps you can quench you thirst there...

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
6 Jul 11, 03:22:19 PM
(Next part sent to PM in order to not give away plot information to party members not privy at this time.)

should i just keep replying by PM till its done?

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 03:23:57 PM
Jimmy stands up and hands the lute to the minstrel, presumably still lying on the floor, and says "I saved your friend. For a moment there, I thought she wouldn't make it, but I did it. Now go and enjoy your life together."

Patterson brushes himself off and casually walks up to the bar. He whips out a fistfull of gold pieces (14 gp) and says "I want ale for everybody here. A life has been saved and it is time for some celebration. Also, I'm on a quest. Once my thirst is quenched, I need to find a damsel in distress. Do you know where I can find one?"

Ishmael
6 Jul 11, 03:28:21 PM
(Next part sent to PM in order to not give away plot information to party members not privy at this time.)

should i just keep replying by PM till its done?

Yes.

Bartholomew Roberts
6 Jul 11, 04:57:00 PM
yes.

His tongue dry from the hot weather, Balki seeks the comfort of Ye Olde Inne for the comfort of air conditioning and a cool ale to soothe his parched throat. And mayhap a lead on his cousin, Cousin Larry.

You find yourself in the Trade District in the Court of the White Bull, there is a tavern nearby called The White Bull Revived. Perhaps you can quench you thirst there...

Balki smiles, shakes hs head, and says out loud to nobody in particular, "A revived white boy cow? Only in Waterdeep!" and enters the tavern.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
6 Jul 11, 05:09:47 PM
Hey Bart, I'm at the bar trying to buy everyone drinks but the barkeeper is ignoring me. What do I see when I look at you during your glorious entrance?

Bartholomew Roberts
6 Jul 11, 07:53:49 PM
You see Balki from Perfect Strangers, part of the famed ABC Friday night TGIF lineup.

eta

http://boringpittsburgh.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/balki-bartokomous.jpg

eta 2


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vbnLYROCj8

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 07:28:51 AM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680502']Jimmy stands up and hands the lute to the minstrel, presumably still lying on the floor, and says "I saved your friend. For a moment there, I thought she wouldn't make it, but I did it. Now go and enjoy your life together."

Patterson brushes himself off and casually walks up to the bar. He whips out a fistfull of gold pieces (14 gp) and says "I want ale for everybody here. A life has been saved and it is time for some celebration. Also, I'm on a quest. Once my thirst is quenched, I need to find a damsel in distress. Do you know where I can find one?"


You see Balki from Perfect Strangers, part of the famed ABC Friday night TGIF lineup.

eta

http://boringpittsburgh.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/balki-bartokomous.jpg

eta 2


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vbnLYROCj8

As you enter the bar you see a rugged looking man buying a round of ale for the entire tavern, you're in luck.

Jimmy: As you are talking to the wench you see a queer looking, whelp of a man enter the tavern. The wench begins drawing ale, "The bloke there too love?" --pointing at the newcomer by the door --

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
7 Jul 11, 07:40:56 AM
Taverns are paradoxical places to the Saint's men: a center of a community, provider of simple pleasures for a simple life, but also potential hotbeds of vice and disorder. Gunter looks over the front facade of this "White Bull Revived." Normally, arms and armor would be out of place in a simple drinking house, but if this was such a gathering place for experienced fighters and explorers as the confessor claimed, it would at worst announce his intentions.

Gunter enters with as little fanfare that the clanking of full plate allows. Anyone looking on would see a tall man in black plate mail with a plain gray surcoat, a bow and quiver at his back, a longsword by his side and an unusually shiny shield at his other hip. The only thing distinguishing him from any other man-at-arms was his hat, wide-brimmed, tall and pointed. He finds a bench near the corner and observers the patrons.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 08:07:23 AM
Jimmy gets really enthusiastic, and even more so at the sight of such a spectacular hat!

"Yes!! Yes, for him too! And for the man in the hat I'll pay even more! Here, take it! Take it!!" Jimmy almost forces an additional 14 gp into the wenches hands.

DESCRIPTION TIME.

Jimmy Patterson is a 6'2" beast of a man, weighing in at almost 220 pounds. All muscle. Clad in shiny chainmail, his face is covered with thick stubble and his hair is long where it hasn't fallen out because of the unnatural chemicals he regularly subjects himself to. His teeth are yellow, but his eyes are clear and thoughtful and are as good as an eagles! Though you probably can't possibly know that.

On his back he carries a large backpack, a little bit dust covered from being on the floor recently. He has by his side a heavy flail, and on his other side a crossbow. Also on his back is a longbow. Several other long objects are also in his backpack, with what appears to be a lance even shoved in there.

In spite of this impressive assortment of heavy objects and armour, by the power of his bulging muscles he still hops around like a little girl at the sight of more people to buy drinks for.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
7 Jul 11, 08:14:16 AM
So much for subtlety, Gunter thinks, but probably impossible with this one anyway. He is not sure what to make of the buffoonish figure at the center of the tavern's attention. Clearly a formidable warrior, but also clearly somewhat touched. Perhaps kicked by a mule or dropped on his head as a child. Or, even more disturbingly, an enthusiastic idealist, mind swollen with dreams and fancies. Idealists, especially naive ones, are dangerous, for dashed hopes turn to despair and dissent all too easily. Might be worth inviting this one along simply to keep an eye on him. Gunter tips the mug offered him to his benefactor and nods in thanks.

Basically trying to just size up the situation, the patrons, etc.

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 10:26:50 AM
And in the corner of the tavern, Rin Finney couldn't believe his luck. Just minutes earlier he had made his way here to drown his sorrows, cursing the suitcase full of nipple clamps, cockrings and other assorted and variously painful looking erotic apparatus that was all he had to show for his morning's thievery. And from such a wealthy looking mark, too!

Yet now, with three of the likeliest potential candidates for masochistically inclined sexual deviancy he had ever laid eyes on just a matter of feet away from him, suddenly he was thinking of a quick sale, at least. And from the way in which the big, stupid one was throwing his money round, perhaps a tidy profit!

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 10:32:17 AM
Where is your character sheet?

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 10:36:14 AM
you said you wanted character sheets from "only these people"

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 10:41:22 AM
8. Von Zipper (http://www.rantsnraves.org/showthread.php?22318-Post-Character-Sheets-that-I-Can-Read-Here&p=680522&viewfull=1#post680522)

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 10:45:10 AM
ok I'm going to have to get Fuzzy to help me but I'll get it sorted asap

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 11:45:30 AM
Jimmy bows in welcome to the man in the excellent hat. "You're welcome, good sir! That is a very fine hat, by the way. You look like a man who knows where I can find damsels in distress to save. Do you know where I can find one? I need to do some heroism and while I just rescued a poor lute from what could have been a fateful end, I am still a long ways from my hero-quota."

Jimmy chugs his tankard of ale and then starts coughing violently because some went down the wrong pipe, but he'll be okay.

Bartholomew Roberts
7 Jul 11, 12:10:13 PM
Wow, free drinks? Only in Waterdeep!

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 12:22:41 PM
You there! You look like a damsel! Where can I find more people like you? Specifically ones in danger.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
7 Jul 11, 12:24:53 PM
Ah, an idealist, then. Gunter smiles. "I don't know of any distressed damsels at the moment. But I think I might know a way to meet your desire for adventure and glory. Are you interested in learning more?"

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 12:43:07 PM
"Frig yeah! Sign me up bro."

Jimmy downs another tankard. This time he does not have a near-death experience.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
7 Jul 11, 01:05:20 PM
That was surprisingly easy. Or maybe unsurprisingly. "I leave soon to take vows as a paladin of Helm, and from there, a life of duties that could take me far and wide in defending order. Such work is always easier with a band of fellow travelers." Hm, I wonder who else would fit the bill, probably not going to find anyone else this tractable.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 01:10:16 PM
"Hahaha. Sure man, order is pretty sweet but it's not really my ball of... ball of... You get the idea. But something like that sounds like it could be fun! Any budding young hero like me needs a band of mates to be led to heroics!"

This is the best possible outcome, for sure. Somebody who actually wants to be Jimmy's friend? Most people just run away screaming because of his various birth defects and rugged appearance! Clearly this is his lucky day and he's sure to find somebody else to join his band of brothers.

He signals the wench to request another tankard.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
7 Jul 11, 01:23:20 PM
Even such casual and light-hearted dismissals of the value of peace and stability edge this person towards the "pike fodder" category. "It's agreed, then. I am Sir Gunter Jae, what might you be called? And do you know any other people as, ah, enthusiastic for danger as you?

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 01:25:49 PM
"My name is Patterson! Jimmy Patterson! I'm pretty new to town so I don't know anyone. Right now, you are my only friend!" Jimmy, looks pensive for a moment, "Other than my loyal steed Applejack! And this random donkey that keeps following me around for some reason."

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 02:05:17 PM
(I'd like to hear from Rin, Tom and a bit more from Balki before I move the plot along more, so it'll be player interaction for a while with the exception of DMing Tom the Druid to this point)

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 02:23:57 PM
Damn cities. Tom can feel the land screaming under all this filth. Not a tree in sight. How can these scurrying ants live like this? Another pack of urchins comes running up to jeer and prod at Chewie. Don't they know that Tom is the only thing stopping him tearing their arms off and beating them to death with the soggy end. He continues to mutter soothing words to keep the big ape placid. Where the hell is this temple anyway? Father really should have put his foot down when your brother said he was running off to become a cleric. Druiding has been good enough for us for generations but no, he wants to live in this rat-infested pile of stone. Not that there is anything wrong with rats but these city ones just don't listen. Even they are removed from the heart of the land.

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 02:41:18 PM
Damn cities. Tom can feel the land screaming under all this filth. Not a tree in sight. How can these scurrying ants live like this? Another pack of urchins comes running up to jeer and prod at Chewie. Don't they know that Tom is the only thing stopping him tearing their arms off and beating them to death with the soggy end. He continues to mutter soothing words to keep the big ape placid. Where the hell is this temple anyway? Father really should have put his foot down when your brother said he was running off to become a cleric. Druiding has been good enough for us for generations but no, he wants to live in this rat-infested pile of stone. Not that there is anything wrong with rats but these city ones just don't listen. Even they are removed from the heart of the land.

You've come in the River gates from the east and you are quite lost. A posted sign says Court of the White bull and there are dozens of caravaneer's camps around the square. There is a tavern nearby named The White Bull Revived. Also there are many petty merchants crowding the court, trying to make a buck. You notice a general sense of magical dis-balance, for lack of better word, in this particular part of the city, fleeting and vague but there nonetheless.

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 02:47:46 PM
Rin has decided that Jimmy is the likeliest sale for his dubious wares, and has resolved to sound him out before proceeding further. He stows the case under the table in the corner and wanders over to the bar to listen in on the conversation, intending to attract as little attention as possible.

He is about 5,8. Slim, early 20s, though perhaps he seems older. Clothing nondescript, typical of your average tavern patron. His jacket is slightly too large for him, but seems to bulge a little in places.

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 02:57:02 PM
Tom shudders at the lack of balance and starts walking towards the merchants. One of them must be wearing a religious symbol of some sort. They would know where the temple district is.

Bartholomew Roberts
7 Jul 11, 03:04:22 PM
(I'd like to hear from Rin, Tom and a bit more from Balki before I move the plot along more, so it'll be player interaction for a while with the exception of DMing Tom the Druid to this point)

I ask around about Larry Appleton.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 03:09:19 PM
"Madam, I have never heard of Larry Appleton. Who is he?"

Ishmael
7 Jul 11, 03:13:47 PM
Tom shudders at the lack of balance and starts walking towards the merchants. One of them must be wearing a religious symbol of some sort. They would know where the temple district is.

You approach the first merchant you see, he offers you some of his wears and you ask him about the temple district. He point towards the tavern, smiles and nods his head as he offers you apples from as small basket.

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 03:25:03 PM
Rin is now waiting for an opportunity to thank Jimmy for the drink, ask him whether he is new in town and suggest they play a game of darts on the board in the corner of the room.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 03:29:20 PM
Jimmy Patterson doesn't notice Rin at all. He is completely oblivious. Partially because he's had too much ale but mostly because he's just not very observant.

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 03:30:04 PM
Tom looks disdainfully at the small,wrinkled fruit in the merchant's basket and walks away towards the tavern. The reek of stale beer and unwashed bodies that wafts through the open door makes him gag momentarily but he steels himself and with a muttered "Guard" to Chewie he enters.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 03:39:08 PM
What does Tom look like :ohmy:?

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 04:14:02 PM
good point.

Tom is a man in his mid-30s. He is of medium height and stocky build. His wild, bright blue eyes are framed by an unkempt mass of dark hair and a long bushy beard streaked with grey. His weatherbeaten complexion speaks of years spent living in the wilderness. He is currently wearing worn travelling clothes with a sickle at his belt. He leans on a gnarled, wrist thick, head high quarterstaff.

Following closely at his heels is Chewie. A 7-foot tall, powerfully muscled, pure white mountain ape. His dark eyes hold a gleam of intelligence not usually seem amongst his kin.

Von Zipper
7 Jul 11, 04:24:08 PM
Rin sees his chance. While everyone is looking at the latest fucking weirdo to crash the joint he taps Jimmy on the shoulder.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 05:15:05 PM
Jimmy has never been more terrified in his life.

In response to the sudden, faint sensation of a finger upon his shoulder he screams "OH GOD NO" and, in an impressie feat of jumping prowess, attaches himself to a miscellaneous chandelier or other hanging object. It fails to support his massive bulk and collapses to the floor with him.

Bartholomew Roberts
7 Jul 11, 05:15:36 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680577']"Madam, I have never heard of Larry Appleton. Who is he?"

Hello! I am Balki Bartokomous from Mypos! I have travelled far to he land of opportunity and wish to meet my cousin, Larry Appleon.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
7 Jul 11, 05:55:50 PM
While still lying on the floor and not entirely sure what it was that touched him on the shoulder, "Hi Balki! I'm Jimmy Patterson. I'm already on a quest to do something important with that Sir Gunter Jae guy over there, but maybe our quests are mystically related and we'll find Larry Appleton along the way! Quests are like that pretty often. Will you be our friend?"

Jimmy gets up and brushes himself off, then extends his hand in greetings.

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 07:17:35 PM
OOC-ready spells

lvl0
detect magic*2
light
purify f+w
read magic

lvl1
entangle
obscuring mist
speak with animals

lvl2
soften earth and stone
reduce animal

lvl3
water breathing

Bartholomew Roberts
7 Jul 11, 08:31:06 PM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680599']While still lying on the floor and not entirely sure what it was that touched him on the shoulder, "Hi Balki! I'm Jimmy Patterson. I'm already on a quest to do something important with that Sir Gunter Jae guy over there, but maybe our quests are mystically related and we'll find Larry Appleton along the way! Quests are like that pretty often. Will you be our friend?"

Jimmy gets up and brushes himself off, then extends his hand in greetings.

Balki shakes jimmy's hand. "oh, my first friend in Waterdeep, this is a wonderful day in the city of splinters! It is very nice to meet you, Jimmy Patter's son."

Balki continues to shake jimmy's hand.

Tom Barrick
7 Jul 11, 08:37:07 PM
*mutters something about counting your fingers after that*

Tom wanders over to the bar tries to catch the tavern keeper's attention

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 06:21:11 AM
Jimmy got up and brushed himself off using his hand which isn't currently occupied with shaking. As the shaking continues, Jimmy starts to feel a little bit uncomfortable. "Hey Balki, it is great to meet you and all, but somewhere out there is a mysterious disembodied hand which touched me on the shoulder just there. It could strike again at any moment. We need to find it as a team!"

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 06:27:24 AM
*mutters something about counting your fingers after that*

Tom wanders over to the bar tries to catch the tavern keeper's attention

You manage to get the old wench's attention and she says, "What can I get you sir?"

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 06:52:34 AM
St. Drizzt_xXx;680610'] but somewhere out there is a mysterious disembodied hand which touched me on the shoulder just there. It could strike again at any moment. We need to find it as a team!"

"Forgive me good sir but I couldn't help overhearing, and I believe it is the ghost of the old beggar Barenbohm that you may have encountered.

Barenbohn was a kindly but, er, poor beggar, who often frequented the square outside this very tavern. Never hurt a fly, truly respectful fellow. But one day when he hadn't eaten in a week his noble heart wavered for just an instant and he reached out for an apple on a market stall, not having no means to pay for it. No sooner had he touched it and the cruel hearted thug the shopkeeper had set to guarding his wares flashed out with his blade and lopped his hand clean off, like.

Well poor old Barenbohn wasn't in the best of health as it happens and he died on the spot, and ever since then it's been said that the hand he lost still haunts the neighborhood, reaching out desperately for the kindness of strangers."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 07:00:56 AM
A tear formed in Jimmy's eye.

http://www.100monkeystyping.com/wlog/tear.jpg

"Wench, please set a tankard of ale aside for... for poor old Barenbohn."

Jimmy wipes the tear away and then tries to regain his composure, his voice still cracking somewhere. "W-what is your name k-k-kind and wise stranger?"

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 07:11:04 AM
"Ah bless you sir. It's said Barenbohn's hand petitions only the purest hearts, so no wonder he should have found his way to you. You've probably got a friend for life there, I expect, a constant shoulder tapping companion to see you through happy and dark days alike.

I'm Capes, by the way. Geoff Capes, of Waterdeep. So very pleased to meet you."

extends hand

stage whispering "You know I wonder if you could even be the one to lift Barenbohm's sad curse and send that hand to rest for once and ... "

eta this is the name Rin usually calls himself in this tavern, though he has numerous other aliases for different locations or disguises

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 07:41:06 AM
Jimmy takes Cape's hand and shakes in as manly a way as possible. "My name is Jimmy Patterson, good sir Capes. These are my two only friends in Waterdeep, Balki and Sir Gunter. Other than my beloved horse Applejack, of course."

He clears his throat. "Will you be my third friend? I'm trying to gather a group of adventurers to go out and do heroic things, like find Balki's cousin and do whatever it is Gunter wants to do. Our meeting here today is not a coincidence, I'm sure. Maybe together we can lift the curse of Barenbohm! And we will surely become rich and get lots of damsels in the process."

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 07:51:01 AM
"Well I'm a humble tradesman, and surely likely to be of little assistance in matters of heroic adventuring - er, especially matters of risking life and limb and fighting. I'm especially not very good at that - but I'll be glad to offer what I ...

Wait ... adventuring, you say? Well perhaps we truly didn't meet by chance ...

I wonder, would you have just a word with me in private ... I have a possibly vital matter to discuss but am honour bound to discretion upon it."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 07:56:23 AM
"Capes, you can trust me with your every intimate secret! You can also count on me to watch your back! That's what friends are for, you know."

eta: Jimmy agrees to chat in private!

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 08:21:45 AM
Rin leads Jimmy towards the empty corner of the tavern, and when out of the earshot of the others speaks in hushed tones

"The thing is, that - tragically - Barenbohm had, quite unbeknownst to himself, inherited a valuable suitcase from a distant relative on the very morning of his untimely demise. Had he stayed alive just another day or so he'd have been able to buy as many apples as he wanted, poor devil.

Now ever since Barenbohm first tapped me on the shoulder as a small boy I've taken an interest in his case, and so at length I sought the advice of a renowned lady seer in the temple quarter. She had a vision that if Barenbohm's suitcase could be sold for just 50 gold - a truly reasonable price I think you'll agree - then his weary, tortured soul would finally be free to pass on into the next life. I asked her what the suitcase contained, and she told me that 'it is filled with myriad wonders, most useful to those of especially adventurous hearts'. She also told me under no circumstances to look inside the case before making the purchase for fear of losing the chance of breaking the curse forever, due to ... ah ... the buyer needing to be as trusting and noble a fellow as Barenbohm himself.

I asked her how I could possibly know the suitcase if I saw it, and she said it would be brown, and be engraved with the initials E.R.D.

Are you with me so far?"

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 08:34:55 AM
"Capes, I am totally with you! Your story sounds a bit unlikely, but I don't think you're the sort of man who would ever lead me wrong. You seem like an honest and good hearted person! But... I simply haven't performed nearly enough heroics to be noble enough to match the kind Barenbohm. Why, I haven't even successfully saved a damsel in years! I wouldn't want to take the suitcase only to open it and find out I'm not good enough to break the curse and, in so doing, destroy any chances of somebody else breaking it in the future!

Friend Capes, come with us on our adventures. In no time, our heroics will be a light in a dark time and together we can buy the case and open it, our pooled good heartedness righting what is perhaps the greatest wrong to ever happen in this land."

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 08:45:25 AM
lip quivers slightly

"It's more than I dared hope. Very well, I'll assist you in your endeavors, and when fate brings that case across our path we will liberate Barenbohm together, although I have a feeling I'm going to be unusually short of cash that day.

Let's not mention anything about the case to the others, though. Wouldn't want to risk it, you know, just on the off chance."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 08:49:56 AM
"Put er there, friend." Jimmy gives a big hug with a tight squeeze. "Now, lets go say hello to this new strange fellow. Perhaps we can make yet another friend before embarking on our wild and amazing journey! Also we should figure out where we're journeying to. Have you had any ale? I've thrown 28 pieces of gold at the wench and asked for drinks for everybody. Surely there is still more ale to be had.

Sir Gunter seemed to have an idea about where to go but I forget what it was."

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
8 Jul 11, 10:37:35 AM
To Gunter's surprise, the rather frivolous "Jimmy" has turned out to be the the most useful contact he could have chosen. All it took was a mention of adventure and he's already organized a party. A surer sign of the Saint's baton favorably tapping on his shoulder there never was. "Our first task is a short but potentially eventful journey to Windor, a town ten miles to the east of here. There I will take vows as a paladin of Helm, and from there, who knows? Doubtless a paladin's life is never a still and unconventional one, there will be many further quests I am sure. I would say that even those who do not feel stout of heart and who have little stomach for danger should not worry; between myself and Jimmy, we have enough muscle to protect against any assailant. Other less martial skills will be vital on the many journeys, all potentially quite profitable to those motivated by temporal gain, sure to come."

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 11:29:22 AM
**some roleplaying awards**
Gunter: 150
Rin: 150
Jimmy: 200
Bart: 25

Bartholomew Roberts
8 Jul 11, 11:29:28 AM
"I am sorry, but I cannot go. I must find Larry Appleton. He is in Waterdeep. Bye."

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 11:36:42 AM
Larry is not in Waterdeep but he might be in Windor.

Bartholomew Roberts
8 Jul 11, 11:38:35 AM
Nah fuck this it's super boring and dumb

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 11:47:51 AM
Nah fuck this it's super boring and dumb

Just then an Umber Hulk burrows through the stone wall of the tavern, gathers Balki in his huge claws and mandibles, and then burrows into the floor while eating him.

http://surbrook.devermore.net/adaptationscreatures/games/dnd/umberhulk.jpg

The monster is gone before the other patrons can respond.

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 11:49:21 AM
The bar wench says, "Oh not this again, I'll go fetch the carpenters and masons." A while later a crew of workers is busy repairing the damage to the tavern.

Ishmael
8 Jul 11, 11:50:10 AM
Balki is dead.

Von Zipper
8 Jul 11, 11:52:19 AM
"oh that Larry Appleton"

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
8 Jul 11, 12:44:25 PM
"Oh no! One of my only friends!"

He points at the strange druidic person,

"You! You look like a pretty cool guy. You shall be the new friend #2. I'm Jimmy Patterson! Who are you?"

Tom Barrick
8 Jul 11, 07:48:27 PM
Tom orders bread and water from the wench and turns to look at Jimmy.

"Good day, I am Tom. Do you know your way around this anthill? I need to find the temple district. My idiot brother has got himself into trouble for interfering with the novices again and I have come to take him home where his depravity can be dealt with at the grove."

Tom strokes the blade of his sickle with a faint smile on his face as he speaks of the grove.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
9 Jul 11, 01:17:51 PM
"Well I don't know where the temple district is in Waterdeep, but I bet Sir Gunter knows where the temple district is in Windor!

If we do manage to find the Waterdeep temple district and your brother needs to be rescued from the novices, preferably with violent force, I will help him in his time of need!"

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
9 Jul 11, 07:13:25 PM
"Erm. Well, I know where a temple in Windor is. And a chapel in this city."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
9 Jul 11, 07:48:29 PM
"Then we must get to the chapel before nightfall if we are to have any chance of defeating the Nefarious Novices."

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
9 Jul 11, 07:54:58 PM
Gunter shrugs. "Well, in the Hall of Justice there is a small shrine to St. Cuthbert, Shepherd of the Law."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
9 Jul 11, 08:03:06 PM
Wobbly, and ready to make many terrible decisions, Jimmy says enthusiastically "Then we must go there! The temple district cannot possibly be far off!"

Heavy flail at the ready, he says with a slur "Tom and Capes and Sir Gunter, are you ready to go perform a valiant rescue to save Tom's brother and... with luck... Barenbohm's immortal soul?"

He stand by the doorway, the sunlight coming in an shimmering through one of his 5 or 6 locks of hair. He gazes outside with a thousand yard stare that might even reach out to two thousand yards, if he squinted a bit. "I know I am."

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
9 Jul 11, 08:08:24 PM
I'm ready to humor you for a few more hours, Gunter thinks. He shrugs and follows Jimmy out. The confessor preferred him to have an entourage, but if needs be, he'd go it alone.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
9 Jul 11, 08:16:03 PM
Jimmy unties Applejack and jumps on top of her. "Where is this :airquote: hall of justice :airquote: , good Sir Gunter?"

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
9 Jul 11, 08:19:26 PM
Jimmy of course knows for a fact that it is in fact a "hall of inequity". No just place will house a ravenous hoard of novices to take advantage of poor druids who don't know any better.

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
9 Jul 11, 08:26:26 PM
oh yeah i totes give directions and stuff LETS GET THIS SHIT ON THE ROAD

Tom Barrick
9 Jul 11, 10:03:21 PM
Tom chuckles "Save him? I'm going to make him a eunuch and then let Chewie have him as a sex toy. Buggering young boys doesn't go down too well where I come from"

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
10 Jul 11, 12:02:59 AM
"Hmm. It would be for the best if you returned him there first. That is the law of your land, but probably not that of Waterdeep." Gunter shrugs. "But more pressingly, public castration in front of a court is... probably unwise."

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
10 Jul 11, 09:33:12 AM
Though Jimmy would normally be violently opposed to castrating people, he didn't hear Tom or Sir Gunter's comments because he was too busy getting ready for heroism.

Ishmael
12 Jul 11, 07:12:50 AM
The four of you load up and make your way to the temple district of the city of Waterdeep. Once you arrive, you discover that Tom's brother was indeed there, having made a the rash decision to enter the priesthood, but changed his mind and had left without word. No one knows whether or not he was going back his his warren home or elsewhere.

Ishmael
12 Jul 11, 07:13:34 AM
(sorry for the delay, I was kinda waiting for Rev Spanky's Ranger but I can easily add him later, especially since he is a ranger)

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
12 Jul 11, 07:57:26 AM
"We must go to his old warren home to try and find him!"

Ishmael
12 Jul 11, 09:44:48 AM
I moved some shit to the peenutz gallery (http://www.rantsnraves.org/showthread.php?22321-Waterdeep-Peanuts)

Reverend Spanky
12 Jul 11, 12:53:03 PM
While the party stands outside the temple discussing their next move, a tall, bearded woodsman leading a horse stops well within earshot. He is arguing heatedly with something unseen:

"I swear if you keep up this caterwauling I will stuff you under a rock in the wilds where you can complain to yourself and the squirrels!"

The muffled response comes from his horse's flank

"I am not caterwauling, heathen! I am simply explaining to you, for the thousandth time, that your dedication to balance in nature is what allows evil to thrive. Through faith, you would be able to suppress the animalistic character, and thus serve as a force for light. Instead, through stubbornness, the total hereditary depravity and corruption of our nature is diffused into all parts of your soul. For our nature is not merely berefit of good, but is so productive of every kind of evil that it cannot be inactive."

"What does that even mean? Hereditary depravity? You just made that up, you twit!"

"No, listen! Total hereditary depravity is"

"Enough! I will not endure another moment of lecture from the likes of you!" Looking skyward, "Fharlanghn, guide my feet to a pit deep enough for this beast and I will fling it there, and travel in peace!"

Tom Barrick
12 Jul 11, 03:16:58 PM
Tom rolls his eyes. "One of those eh? You are already in a pit. Just sling it in this temple where it belongs and come with us somewhere civilised with trees and stuff. I'm not staying here looking for that idiot brother of mine. If he goes home they know what to do with him."

Reverend Spanky
12 Jul 11, 03:41:39 PM
Looking at the druid

"I've already carried it in to every temple I can find in this place, and nobody seems to know what to do with the goddamn thing. Plus, every time I lay a hand on it I get all wobbly and, well, unpredictable. It doesn't seem to like me that much, but you should hear it howl if I try to leave it behind. Maybe your inquisitor friend over there can calm its nerves, they likely see eye-to-eye more."

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
13 Jul 11, 07:49:11 AM
Gunter squints and tries to figure out what this newcomer is actually talking to. "Sorry to say, but whatever manner of spirit you've been talking to is terribly confused theologically. The idea of law as a bridle to a fundamentally chaotic nature is a fallacy, since intelligent species generally tend to produce some manner of law and custom to provide order suitable to their needs without any external prodding. This is a gift from the gods, written into our souls from the creation. In any case, dedication to law and order does not intrinsically oppose evil, as malicious hearts can unfortunately twist the law to their malign benefit. Such villains use the aegis of stability and peace which the law provides as a shield for their ruinous activities. The question of when the fundamental evil of an entire system of laws, crafted for the benefit of its makers, outweighs any peace it provides, is a difficult one to weigh. But 'balance with nature' in any case is irrelevant; societies of the wild which are slandered as barbarous often have stronger and surer bonds than any 'civilized' city."

eta: Gunter has not introduced himself as an inquisitor, simply as an aspiring paladin. He has no actual badge of inquisitorial office on display. So I don't know how Spanky's character would even know Gunter is anything but a fighter.

Ishmael
13 Jul 11, 08:00:27 AM
eta: Gunter has not introduced himself as an inquisitor, simply as an aspiring paladin. He has no actual badge of inquisitorial office on display. So I don't know how Spanky's character would even know Gunter is anything but a fighter.

(the Ranger does not have this information in character, so just abridge his dialogue and have him say "the cleric" or "holy warrior" or w/e)

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
13 Jul 11, 08:03:29 AM
Jimmy looks ponderously at the newcomer. What an interesting man. Why is he talking to himself?

His mighty steed Applejack looks longingly at the woodsman's horse. She licks her lips and snorts with excitement.

"Applejack, what did I tell you about wanting to pork strange stallions?" He lets out a sigh. "Fine, I'll introduce you two.

Excuse me good sir! My name is Jimmy Patterson! I will ask you about being my friend shortly, but first things first; What is your horses name? Mine is named Applejack!"

Reverend Spanky
13 Jul 11, 09:31:15 AM
"Well, Cleric, you've got a more realistic grasp on the world than poor Calvin here, but I fear there's nothing to be done with him in Waterdeep. Nobody can fix that kind of fanaticism. I should have left him lying on the side of the road ... come to think of it, it probably wouldn't have been the first time."

"And it's nice to meet you, Jimmy. My horse is called Dimitri, but he's not available for breeding services right now. I need to move on, I've been in this city for a week already and the road is looking better and better."

Bartholomew Roberts
13 Jul 11, 10:16:00 AM
Ishmale says I have to play over on tr so I don't know how to do this or whatever but ANYWAYS Carlos the dwarf is a dwarf who is walking along or something but according to that wiki page there's no temple for the dwarf god plus he's a fighter he doesn't pray and shit so

Ishmael
13 Jul 11, 10:18:42 AM
Ishmale says I have to play over on tr so I don't know how to do this or whatever but ANYWAYS Carlos the dwarf is a dwarf who is walking along or something but according to that wiki page there's no temple for the dwarf god plus he's a fighter he doesn't pray and shit so

A dwarf is walking along around the the temple area and accidentally bumps into Jimmy.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
13 Jul 11, 01:59:20 PM
Jimmy trips over the dwarf.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
13 Jul 11, 01:59:50 PM
"FRIG."

Bartholomew Roberts
13 Jul 11, 02:19:13 PM
Pardon me, sir! I was on my way to the castle to see if the militia could use a skilled pikesman or something!

Ishmael
13 Jul 11, 02:40:50 PM
moved some dumb shit to the peanutz (http://www.rantsnraves.org/showthread.php?22321-Waterdeep-Peanuts&p=680908#post680908)

Tom Barrick
13 Jul 11, 03:53:13 PM
Tom raises an eyebrow "Aren't you a little on the short side for the pike?"

Bartholomew Roberts
13 Jul 11, 06:46:18 PM
Nah, I'm the best at being a pikeman on Waterdeep.

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
13 Jul 11, 08:34:24 PM
"I believe you, buddy.

You're my buddy now, by the way."

Bartholomew Roberts
13 Jul 11, 09:17:10 PM
Alright then.

Bartholomew Roberts
13 Jul 11, 09:32:15 PM
ANYWAYS I wanna go to castLe Waterdeep! Are you familiar with the military here?

Ishmael
16 Jul 11, 06:55:16 AM
(fyi: MONDAY morning I will get this shit moving forward some kind of way)

xXx_[SSJ] St. Drizzt_xXx
17 Jul 11, 07:18:23 AM
ANYWAYS I wanna go to castLe Waterdeep! Are you familiar with the military here?

"No! I am new to town!"

Rivers Cuomo Fan #754
19 Jul 11, 01:07:02 PM
and so the party dicked around for a few hours until shrugging and going their separate ways. the end.

Ishmael
19 Jul 11, 04:46:03 PM
shits still not moving